Girl He Ain’t Slick (Letter 000003) -syndicated

I don’t even have an intro for this one. I really need my readers to get involved on this one because maybe I’m not seeing something.

Tyler Perry’s- Why Did I Get Married?

I am a single mother of 3 children by 2 men. Before I get the side eyes and sucking through the teeth that I am a whore, I ve only been with 2 men my whole life. I am 33. The father of my last 2 children and I havent been together in 2 years, however he is engaged to a woman. I am truly pissed off because I was in a relationship with him for 9 years. 9 freaking years no ring, no proposal. I was there for him for several ups and downs. That car he drive in my name. Me and his children are riding the bus. He seems to be happy about this new chick and I dont know why. I gave him everything my twenties, my body, and I was his personal incubator for 2 of his children. I feel that I should be the one with the ring. Everytime he talks about her its like she can move mountains, spit fire out of her ass, and shit puppies and rainbows. I just want to fade to black and beat some sense into his ass that she will never love you like I have and will. I am not letting him see ***** and ******** until he gets back with me. I mean it. What I want to know is how can I get him back? I know he loves me because he cant be that stupid. I’m a great catch. I got a job at the shoe store, I just moved out from living with my mom and I have lost most of the baby weight. I want that ring. I deserve it. I dont know why he wants to make an honest woman out of her not not the mother of his child.

Signed,

Forever Waiting

Lady….. lady, lady, lady! I don’t really think that the answer I’ve prepared for you is what you’re looking for.

You need help. If you do get him back I assure you, you’ve not gained a thing. Your worth is not simply tied to the list of attributes you’ve taken the time to share. Your self-respect is at an all time Zero. I can sympathize with your type, you want a family, you thought you were in love, you never learned how to be treated. I don’t blame you for what got you to this point, however if you continue down this path it’s all on you. Here’s a list of all the things that someone should have told you about life that you can now apply towards thinking clearly and making good decisions.

1. You can ALWAYS say NO- Nobody takes away your right to choose how to spend your life. The next man you let into your life, the next child you bring into this world, be very clear that they are there because of YOU saying YES. Examine your situation and be sure that your next move is your best move (to take a line from Goldie the pimp)

2. Number one applies to EVERYBODY- Including your beloved children’s father. There was a song way back when we were kids that went “I can’t make you love me, if you don’t” It still rings true today. I’ll never tell someone how to feel, but you’ve got to come to terms with the fact that your feelings are not being reciprocated.

3. Keeping your children away from their father is trifling unless he’s a horrible person in general.

4. The jewelry store is open every day…even Sundays. If you want a ring that bad, buy yourself one.

5. Please define “an honest woman” in 2013… -because if you know the definition now, that means you’ve always known it because that’s an old school reference. At what point in time did you set the standard that you wouldn’t bring a life into this world without the conditions of “honesty” that you hold dear? It’s clear that you haven’t so let’s just get past that and try to do better on the back end.

6. I don’t know if you know if he’s a reader of mine or not, but this reads like the breakdown of an Otis Redding song. I love all of my readers, and I do what I can to keep you anonymous, but those are some unique names so had I not removed them, it might be easy to figure you out.

Tighten Up.

-All Love

Related articles

• Stresses of the Single Mother (123mymdblog.com)
• Top Naija Celeb (Rich n’Famous) But Not Married (jeniesgiovanni.wordpress.com)
• The Plague – “Single Motherhood” (huesofblues722.wordpress.com)
• For the want of Love (jackhart1968.wordpress.com)

A New Neighborhood

Before I get into today’s blog. If you haven’t taken time out to listen to ‘Control’ do your self a Google favor and look that up. That’s not what today’s blog is about, but Kendrick Lamar is stirring up what Hip-Hop has been waiting for and I don’t want you to miss it…. oh yeah it’s Big Sean’s song… but hey.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/08/13/kendrick-lamar-control-big-sean_n_3748466.html



Anyway moving is for the birds. I’m sure most of us can agree. Unless you’re in a position to move into exactly what you’re looking for without having to go through much, those of us that still have budgets are in for a roller-coaster.

Here’s what trips me out about Cincinnati housing, which is completely different from Atlanta and New Orleans spending more money is not the way out of the ghetto. See in New Orleans, at least when I was there I could buy my way away from ratchet problems. Yes, I had a peeping-tom, but I didn’t have roaches doing the double-dutch hop trying to find a way into my building.

In Cincinnati, the higher priced apartments that are below $1000/month are where subsidized vouchers etc. are accepted. So in an instance where $7-800 would normally put you somewhere with a gate, 24hr on site maintenance and a few pools to choose from in the south, here it’s a guarantee that you’ll be beside, above or below a hollering baby and/or a couple that fights/freaks entirely too loud.

I’m thoroughly confused and I refuse to pay ownership prices for temporary living in less square footage. I know that there has to be a city that has a great neighborhood/place to live. Share with me your favorite neighborhoods and if you’re from around Cincinnati, how do you get away from the hood without moving to Mason?

I’d love to know.

Hope you all have been doing well. I slowed up since I’m in the midst of a move/house-hunt but I’m still here. Email- marellewrites@gmail.com if there’s something you want me to sound off about.

Something……

http://mimiandeunice.com

We live in such a something for nothing society that a get rich quick scheme is as close as your most gullible friend. Lately there seems to be an influx of young ladies that believe that the side chick/hoe life is a great route to travel on the road to getting something for nothing. The fatal flaw in the logic is that although you may get something, and the work may not have been that hard, you’ve paid for it more than anyone else.

Let’s explore the facts:

So, you’ve secured a position as a sidepiece or  something of that nature. Even if you get the ultimate promotion to “wife”, because we’ve witnessed the transition take place a few times, your old job didn’t dissolve. Your promotion is in fact a demotion because of how you obtained the position. See, you used to get invited to all the arm-candy events, hang out with the crew and the other sidelines, but now you’re the enemy. You thought you were going to be the Queen of Whores, when you’ve actually become the court jester among wives.

Let’s say you recognize game and you don’t mind your current position and aren’t looking for a promotion. You’ve just signed on for a pay as you go plan, that’s right, you have the shelf-life of a drop phone. As soon as he’s done and the new model comes along, you’re in the trash without so much as a cancellation call. The thought of this makes some females without substance nervous which is when they activate the trap.

You found the baller of your dreams, he’s not trying to make you his wife, so now you’re looking to secure your payday for at least the next 18 years. You’re working on dropping a baller’s bundle, here’s where you’ve messed up completely. You’re about to make an exchange of something for everything. You’re risking your health, snap-back, shape and self-respect for a check and association. It’s my sincere wish that my readers know someone in this position that they can forward this to and stop the madness before shit goes all wrong.

There’s no such thing as Something for Nothing. Most things that start with “All you have to do is…” are tied to some of the most heinous and/or toxic things your could introduce into your life. There has to be a limit, you may not have had to clock-in or think too hard for the things you get in life, but you’ve got to live with yourself.

Think about it.
Pass it on.
Challenge me if you think I’m wrong.